Teething Wells

Teething Wells was an oik who often gigged with the likes of Seething Wells, Attila the Stockbroker, Ginger John and Porky the Poet in the 80s. Most of these gigs were in between bands and sound systems or at ranting shows. After resting on his laurels he returned to poetry and started the poetry ‘zine Rising.
Here’s a rant he used to read in 1981 that is based on an anonymous IWW poem from 1917.

I love my flag, I do, I do,
that floats upon the breeze.
I also love my arms, my legs,
my feet, my toes, my knees.
One little shell might spoil them all
or give them such a twist,
they would be of no use to me
so I guess I won’t enlist.

I love my country, yes I do,
I hope our men do well.
Without their arms and legs and things
I think they’d look like hell.
Men with faces half shot off
are unfit to be kissed.
I’ve read in books, it spoils their looks
so I guess I won’t enlist.

I love our leaders, sure I do,
in a bunker underground.
When the atom bombs go off
they won’t hear a sound.
If we gave them rifles,
how long would they exist?
They’re not fighting. Why should I?
So I guess I won’t enlist.

teething wellsbw
Teething Wells at a miner’s strike benefit, the Burial played!, 1984

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2 thoughts on “Teething Wells

  1. Pingback: Die Suppenspuckermonologe | Bigshotzine

  2. Pingback: Forgotten Rants | standupandspit

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